Who needs fire departments?

From a rather interesting website I frequent. The people there are odd, and I like it.

Fire companies are not needed.

Contact a metal bucket company, order one for every person in your town, the bulk discount should make each bucket like 40 cents or something. Require everyone carry around a metal bucket filled with water and some soap. In case of a fire, everyone nearby should swarm it with their buckets. The water+soap is basically a foam extinguisher, which for our intents and purposes can do electrical, grease, and standard fires.

If there is a medical emergency, you can use the soapy water to clean the wounds, or drown the person if they’re in agony.
If people are against this threaten to make them all buy medical encyclopedias. Those things are a billion dollars each.


Other things metal buckets ™ can do:
1) Be worn as a safety helmet to deflect burning embers
2) The soapy water can be doused on people trapped in a fire so they can escape without having their clothes or hair caught on fire
3) If someone is having a heart attack, seizure, or literally any loss of consciousness, dousing them with water is the first step towards recovery
4) Once you dump the soapy water, you can fill the bucket with other things to throw on the fire/injured person (like sand, chloroform, etc)
5) Advice people to make their own special bucket as a way of coaxing the public into the bucket program. Some people can draw faces on the bucket, kids can keep fish in their bucket.
6) Advanced safety methods can be taught, like keeping leeches in the water of the bucket, to suck out toxins from snakebites on injured people.

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